How will you remember me?

Remember me as a friend. We shared more than just a few good laughs. We shared slices of our lives. With a few, it’s been a voyage exploring life. With others, more like a rowdy evening on a port after several months at sea. No matter what, we’re kindred. Remember me for the weight i pulled, not the burden i was.

Remember me as a team-mate. Know this, i’d disagree with you always. But never dissent. If we worked together, i probably was (too) critical. Not because i thought you couldn’t do any better, but because i wanted you to raise the bar. If we played together, i was possessive of your skills. Not because i coveted them, but because i believed they (vastly) improved mine. Remember for the covenant we shared.

Remember me as a brother. We are fruits of the same tree. Our branches different. We both fed on the same sap, sun, and air. Yes, our ancestry was the same. Yet heritage never passed down in even parts. Neither did the heirlooms. A few scraps of common values we have. As brethren, remember me as your blood. If not my soul.

Remember me as family. Even if i’ve knew you for a few minutes or our lives crossed paths more than once, or we oft walked familiarly old lanes hand in hand, know this: i always valued the preciousness of your life. We may have grown together, share the same childhoods, and the same things that troubled you, troubled me. However, even if did begin our journeys together, our paths were different. It may so be that i did not understand your path, or ever wanted to. Rest assured, i always wished you’d reach where you wanted to.

Remember me as a student. Our meeting changed me. I cannot say how or what changed. But you meeting me, changed us both. And i may not have learned anything of you, i did realise a little more of myself. Remember me for this gratitude.

If you loved me, remember me as someone who loved you back. Immensely. For no reason. For all my defects, and your virtues. For all your warmth, and my dependencies. For all my cravings, and your indulgence. For your wisdom, and my indiscretions. If you loved me, remember me for our love.

Remember me then, as not who i was. But who you thought i was. Who you believed i was. Or as the person you thought i could be.

I hoard books. I live in a perpetual state of denial. I’m always curious. I’m getting old. What do i write about?

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